Been A While
Been a while since I went Substack on my life. Substack went through a UI revamp which is interesting. Honestly, I myself went through a UI revamp here. I have the time to write while I travel 2 hours one side for my part-time job, but I just don’t because my brain does not want to do anything slightly productive. Half my brain thinks I am wasting my time by not writing during travelling but then the other half keeps telling me that the first half is a bitch and always keeps telling you that, despite you doing great and having worked another 8-hour shift.
I am doing fine here with a couple of hiccups, but what’s life with zero problems?
Nightmare(s)
Aug 13:
This happened yesterday.
I put up this note on Instagram as a joke:
I stayed up till 6 am playing video games. I play games as an escape from my reality, bouncing into different alternate ones to cope with the fact that my real one sucks. I don’t have trouble sleeping, it’s actually worrying I sleep mostly just as I close my eyes.
My nightmare was terrible. I went to India and decided to get back with her, but apparently, I was on the go with my family, jumping places and yet somehow trying to meet her in the chaos. I was unable to meet her and get back together.
This nightmare felt too real. I am someone who doesn’t even remember what I had yesterday in lunch, so if I remember this dream it must’ve been BAD. Anyway, it’s not like I am not over this, it’s been more than a year, and I am sure I am better than before. I am over this.
Everyone tells you how to get over your breakup, but no one tells you how to get over your best friend.
My Indian friends read this in disbelief and throw bottles at me while my Canadian friends have no idea.
Aug 20:
I am running away from something. Something that I cannot see. I am just running and hiding from this thing with someone. Some voice tells me not to look in the opposite direction and keep running. Me being me wants to look and try to look at it. Then I froze. Suddenly I realized I am in a dream. I am conscious now but still unable to turn my head in that direction. It was so scary that I woke up sweating.
Google says you see nightmares mostly when you are under stress or anxiety or both.
Amusement Park
I went to Canada’s Wonderland which is a 10/10 place for all our amusement park needs. The college bus was supposed to go back at 6 pm but I stayed back till 10 pm with one friend. Probably my happiest day of July I guess.
Ripley’s Aquarium
The aquarium was a great one-time experience. Here’s Nemo and Dora:
Breaking the iMac
I was so bored in life that I decided to downgrade my iMac to its officially supported version in hopes that it'll work fast. Currently, it’s on modded MacOS Catalina.
I wiped off the current OS but couldn't install the lower version because it requires another Mac to create a bootable macOS USB. I'll give this a shot since I borrowed the Type-C to Type-A cable required to do this on the latest Mac. It's pathetic that Apple has made the simplest of bullshit so difficult to accomplish but okay you don't need to be held accountable since you are a reputed giant.
After weeks of struggle, I finally fixed it. After the downgrade, it works well enough I am actually able to write a new piece on it so there’s that.
It actually works pretty well for a machine built in 2009. It runs GTA: Vice City smoothly. I also managed to get playable 30fps on Left 4 Dead 2. Apple, I am impressed.
1-Person Rule
I went from an excellent homies group to still continue to discover a perfect fit group. The friends here are nice but they bail on plans because we all are just friends I guess. I believe I need a 4-boys homie group where we just hang out and chill (and their idea of the meeting isn't drinking always). Maybe take long shots on building random startups or solving one’s problems or something.
My relationship with everyone here is not the best but isn’t the worst either. It feels like everyone is individually great. I’ve hung out with each and every one individually & they are great people; so many stories waiting to be told. But when we group up I feel it’s a complete shitshow. Recently, 10 people decided to get together (acquaintances and friends). I went there and all I wanted to do was to get home first thing. I believe it was the fault of the place and not the people, but you do get my point.
There's this rule I follow here since getting my group to go somewhere is impossible. It's just I try to convince one person instead of the whole group. It works great and I get to go to the places I always wanted to go.
There’s this certain level of how much everyone should know about you here. Weird but yes, just stay quiet and do your thing. I am not really sure at what point should I stop sharing. Mostly I end up oversharing and I feel like I shouldn’t have done that because then I feel I get judged. It was not like that back then, I believe earlier me and my group collectively used to swim in the same mud puddle, enjoying and helping each other out when stuck. Here it’s more like “What the f**k are you doing in that mud puddle?”
Just to clarify, I am not lonely and wailing for friends. I know people here that I am comfortable with. But sometimes, just maybe sometimes, you get bored of yourself and your stupid work and your stupid video games and stupid TV series and stupid books.
YEEZY YEEZY
I accidentally ordered a $300 pair of shoes which I’ll have to pay for. It seems there’s no way out from it. I’ll be paying a big price for a big mistake.
Dungeons & Dragons
For 2-3 weeks straight, I went to a D&D club with a friend to learn more about it. It’s a fun game. We designed our characters and now I look forward to playing it every week.
Down Medically
After working for 8-days straight, my body decided to shut down on me. I couldn’t get up for the next two days and had to take another two days and I am still not completely healthy to go to work. Plain case of “If you won’t take an off, your body will decide itself when to.”
More Than Usual TV
I have been watching Newsroom, and it’s some amazing drama folks. Finish two seasons in four days and I wanna take it slow because sadly it has only three seasons.
My series vibe has kinda shifted from mystery to romcom/dramas because my real life has none. Life only has a lot of mystery regarding the future.
WWE MONDAY NIGHT RAW LIVE!
This was on my bucket list. From watching one-week-old broadcasts to waking up at 5 am to watch WWE Raw live, I grew up. And yesterday, I finally watched WWE Raw live, and it was surreal. I thought I would be seated further, but I wasn’t. The wrestlers were actually pretty visible and it was a great experience. Only honest disappointment: No Shanky or Jinder Mahal. Also no Seth Rollins.
I also bought a replica belt which is currently with a friend. Cool shit and an amazing day.
Old Drafts
I have a couple of unfinished drafts. I think I’ll probably compile and publish a combined newsletter for the same.
Till then goodbye I guess. Take care fellas! :)
Beautiful 🤌🤌🤌